My Blog Posts

This just in, and rocketing to number one on my list of books to buy, a teaser for Neal Stephenson’s new book Quicksilver, volume one of what he has called “The Baroque Cycle”. If you haven’t read any of his books then shame on you, and line up behind me to get this one, you will thank me. [link courtesy of Boing Boing]

I’ve found out where all of the good music has gone to - BBC - 6 Music. Sadly only available on the intarweb or new fangled digital radio but we’ve got a nice fat pipe at work (ooh err). Although I’m sure the 70’s throwback will say that its not quite retro enough they are currently running a feature on The Smiths, still the finest pop band in the world. Well, possibly in a dead heat with Squeeze.

Add this to the list of things that Bobo shouldn’t be looking at any time soon. Still, it is quite funny. Although still not as funny as the duck, to whom many thanks for that link. Today I am mostly listening to Anoraknophobia and am actually back at my desk after what feels like several months in the wilderness [our records show it was three and a half weeks in Accrington].

I’m back from Accrington, for a while at least, and the Fast Show is on UK Gold. All is well in the world for the time being. This evening’s episode included the tip-top classic sketch where Ralph tells Ted that his wife is dead (“Tomato, Ted Aubergine, Your, Potato, Wife’s Turnip, Dead. “). Oh, how we laughed. Which just goes to show that I need a holiday, or more Fast Show DVDs.

This week I shall mostly be eclectic. On the train from Euston to Preston I have been listening to; Led Zeppelin - Physical Graffiti Macy Gray - The Trouble With Being Myself Evan Dando - Baby I’m Bored Now, sadly, I’m back in the world of the cloth cap and rain. I’d better get on with some work.

Today is now officially Spinal Tap quote day here in the “Grim Up” North. To paraphrase Not the Nine O’Clock News - “Whenever two or more are gathered together they shall recite the lines of St Hubbins, Tufnel and Smalls” Ever eager that you, dear reader, can join in the fun, here are the web sites we have been using as cheat sheets; IMDB SpinalTapFan.com Frequently Unasked Questions about Spinal Tap

Although this page is called my diary it is a more of a jotting pad. A place where I can make notes and asides, and where the occasional reader can leave some well meaning banter. If you haven’t - shame on you. Just position your cursor over the word ‘Comments’ at the bottom of the article, click once and type away in the window that pops up to leave me a note.

To put the tin lid on it, the air conditioning in this building doesn’t work. Which is a bit of an issue as there is glass everywhere. Suffice it to say that it is now half past three in the afternoon and the temperature at my desk is in the low twenties (centigrade) and rising. Bugger.

As an alternative to hardcore language issues may I direct you towards 300 reasons why we love The Simpsons. The. Greatest. TV. Show. Ever.

I was also going to point out that I’m not alone in my sadness. But Ciaran has managed to bugger up his archives. So I can’t put in a permanent link to his complete and utter lack of content on the 22nd and 24th of April. Mind you, the preceding entries could probably do with a bit of pepping up as well.

Today’s language dilemma of the day is - how do you spell web site? Should it be two words or one? Should there be any capitalisation because its a noun? Or should I really not care. Obviously I care, because I am the grammar police. Asking some “authoritative” sites on the net give us the following results; Dictionary.com says one word or two. So they are no help. The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy has no opinion either way. So they are no help. Everything2.com is firmly of the opinion that it is two seperate words. But they rejected a post I lovingly wrote about a year ago so I shall ignore them in a fit of pique. Ahem, Microsoft Word, ahem is happy with either one word or two. So they are probably wrong, as usual. Wikipedia, the collaborative online encyclopedia, entitles its entry with only one word but does mention that the two word version is a valid alternative. So there you go, a conclusive result. No one really cares. Except the grammar police of course, and we are still watching you.

This one is for Mr Rath, a vasectomy story to rival his own. That scaryduck is one funny chap I tell you. Now, enough of this frivolity and enjoyment. I’m off to design a data model for a query handling system. The joy, oh the joy.

Today, I have mostly been thinking about linguistic relativism, speaking relatively and other metaphysical concepts. I often find myself thinking about the relativism of things, and just how subjective our view of the world is. Someone, somewhere, I’m sure has written a great science fiction story including a piece of technology which, when applied to a person, strips them of their preconceptions and shows them how the world really is. If there isn’t one then I claim first dibs on the idea.

Sorry kids, I’m stuck in North West England with limited interweb access and a rather tight schedule. Discussion of the proper use of modern English and my wonderful taste in music will be sporadic for the next couple of weeks. Feel free to leave comments and suggestions though, I should be able to check them occassionally. Especially Mr Cowle, who has been very quiet recently.

I mentioned Scaryduck earlier this week when I discovered the blog. But today, at lunch time to boot, I found myself howling with laughter, tears streaming down my cheeks as I perused one then another of the stories at Scaryduck’s House of Lies. If you don’t find them funny you must be clinically dead. Or perhaps you’re just not a thirty-something Englishman with fond memories of Grange Hill and the school science club. Not that I ever went to science club you understand, I’m not that big a geek.

Whatever you do, don’t show Bobo these cute puppy photos. Before you know it she’ll be saying “Bod needs a pet, aren’t dogs lovely” and I will be knee deep in cans of Chum. That way lies madness my friends. Madness I tell you.

Mrs Palmer, you are a shocker. When I posted my list of all time top five favourite albums of all time last week her comment was “who is Chris Difford?” Mrs P, you live in a cultural vacuum. So, who is the best lyricist of his generation? Well, he wrote some of these gems; Don’t shoot that singer, you’re shooting number one The squaw is with the corporal, She is tied against the tree, She doesn’t mind the language its the beatings she don’t need The Sweeney’s doing ninety, ‘Cos they got the word to go, They get a gang of villains in a shed up at Heathrow Sunlight on the lino, woke me with a shake, I looked around to find her but she’d gone They do it down on camber sands, they do it at Waikiki I never new it would happen, with me and the girl from Clapham Late evenings by the fire, little kicks inside her The last one is a particular favourite in our house at the moment, strangely enough.

“I know lads, lets get the band back together.” I for one can’t wait. As the 70’s throwback would say - rocktastic.

Finally, before the lights go really dim and the backup generator has to kick in, another top link for the 70’s throwback. At this page Roddy Lumsden is discussing short music reviews. As we all know the shortest, and best, critical appraisal of a piece of popular music was the two word summary of the merits of Spinal Tap’s “Shark Sandwich”. Said review was, for the culturally impaired, “Shit Sandwich” Sorry for the swearing but it was a quote, and it was in context. [Courtesy of NTK]

Bobo bought me a copy of Big Lad in the Windmill at the weekend. I’ve just loaded it onto my PC at work. How happy am I? On a scale of one to ten, this one comes in at about eleven. Sweetie, you are the best. On a boring note, this web site (and associated) email address may be a little shaky over the next day or so. Please accept my apologies for any disruption to your reading pleasure whilst we muck about with nasty technical things like DNS and server configuration.